Girl in the Box

We share a name, we have the same face and the same voice, but we're not the same person. I'm supposed to be out there, to be happy. I should be earning money, buying a car and going to the movies with friends. I should be able to get a tattoo and Pierce my nose, but I'm not out there. Instead, I'm stuck here, inside this box. This tiny, glass box.

I can see her, the girl who claims she's me. She introduces herself, she talks in my place and hides away when I get close. She takes a hold of my relationships and uses them how she sees fit.

I yell out and she looks back, she wears a smile, but she doesn't look happy. I touch the glass and call to her... It's cold when she's there, I wanna escape, but how do I break out? Someone talks to her and she leaves me, I'm alone again.

She's struggling, I try to help but she doesn't come closer. She distances herself from everyone, I tell her to go to them, ask her to talk, but she stays in bed that day.

I scream and pound on the glass, how desperately I want to get out, to play in the sun and have some friends. I want to talk to people, but she won't let me.

She's afraid, she doesn't let me out for fear of what may happen to her. I want to win, I pound and pound until my hands hurt. I want to be inside my own body again, she's not me.

I put her inside the box, and she wants out, but I want to shine. I can feel the warmth on my skin, I'm finally me again. I can feel her, the grip on my throat, the ice cold water in my veins. My hands sweat with anxiety and I lie awake in fear, she's clawing at the glass, she wants control, but I don't want to go back in. I'm finally me.

I don't like the dark.

The girl with my face scares me, she's always here, I try to ignore her, but sometimes she sneaks up on me like a stalker in the night. She's not me, so why do we share the same body? Why can't anyone else see her? Why can't they help me? Am I alone?